While I was in Thailand my indestructible Olympus 1030 Stylus camera decided to go on the fritz. It seems that externally it survives everything but internally it can’t survive a battery leaking highly corrosive chemicals through out it’s chassis, but hopefully that is repairable. So for most of my trip to Thailand I couldn’t take any photos but I do have some from the beginning of it and Yuki has been wonderful enough to send me massive quantities of her photos to satiate my need to document everything I do. So here are just some photos of the Koh Phuket for your viewing pleasure.

I know that my first post about Phuket was almost completely negative sounding but for those of you that know me well, you know I would find a way to have fun. Well I definitely had tons of fun and created tons of ridiculous stories.

The day I arrived at the Phuket airport I connected up with a Kiwi guy named David who is truly an awesome cat. Anyways we had an opening night of debauchery at the Tiger on Bangla Road, but the next day we set out to have an epic day! So after walking around aimlessly looking for a decent restaurant to get some breakfast which was then promptly ingested we came up with a game plan. This was the plan get a Thai Massage,  go watch some people kick the shit out of each other at a Muay Thai match, and then go to the Lady Boy Cabaret…all in all it was a plan to maximize awesomeness and ridiculousness.

Step 1: The Thai Massage
As mentioned in a previous post everywhere you go in Thailand you are constantly accosted by hordes of Thai Masseuses shouting “Thai MASSSAGGGE!” at you from every street and alley. So I opted to go for one that I remember my buddy Bryan mentioning called Christie’s or something close to that which was a giant pink building which seemed more respectable compared to the small dingier looking places. Well as David and I enter this place my something is wrong sense went off when I notice that this massage place had a full bar in the entrance and that there was a tiered stage from where the “masseuses” present themselves so to speak. Well this place wasn’t open and I wasn’t open to that ‘type’ of massage instead opting for the small place next door. I found out from Bryan that later that he mentioned it because Christie’s had a tragic history of sex slavery, but somehow I didn’t get that part of the story…like i said Thailand is somewhat messed up. Anyways, I got my first massage I have ever received which felt absolutely awesome! Also in true Thai style it even concluded with the aged Masseuse offering a handjob which I objected to promptly.

Step 2: Muay Thai Fight!
After getting an awesome massage and feeling extraordinarily limber (also a little sore) David and I went and picked up some tickets for the nights Muay Thai Boxing match over at Bangla Boxing Stadium, after which we decided to start the night off right with some drinks at a local bar. A little wobbly from the bar we arrived a bit earlier and selected some seats on the second story with an awesome vantage point of the entire ring. On account of us arriving there so earlier we were forced to listen to the most hypnotic recording I have ever heard. Basically who ever did this recording should be hired by a terrorist state to make torture or brainwashing tapes. After 30 minutes of listening to this track I could not get “Tonight, Tonight Muay Thai Boxing Bangla Boxing Stadium. Super real Muay Thai boxing…” out of my head for the rest of the damn trip. It was to the point of being a joke between David and I also Yuki (who you have not met yet) and I. Hell even Bryan had the song still memorized after being back in Korea for months! Damn that recording guy was crafty…. After being thoroughly mind fucked by some Thai Boxing brainwashing propaganda David and I thoroughly enjoyed watching people kicking the shit out of each other. Including a South Korean who won with a KO and some Swedish monster that destroyed his competitor.

Step 3: Lady-Boy Cabaret
The final act to complete this ridiculous day was to go to a Lady-Boy cabaret. In Thailand, there is almost a third sex it seems male, female, and ladyboy (locally known as kathoey). Basically, as the term lady-boy sounds these are men who are transgendered and cross dress as women with astounding and sometimes down right mind bogglingly convincing success. The Lady-Boys were part of some of the most intriguing experiences I had in Thailand. They were such an absolute culture shock and not to mention totally ridiculous and funny as hell (although sometimes scary too). There is even a World Champion Muay Thai Boxer who is a Kathoey, named Nong Tum who even has a documentary movie about her. I have known about Lady-Boys for a long time since I worked for the Bleu Spoon in Aptos, CA while I was in University because the owners and half the staff were Thai. Also Bryan had told me tons of crazy stories about them during his stint in Thailand. All this hype made me very intrigued to see first hand what they were talking about…well I got more than I expected. Basically, I wanted to go to the big stage cabaret but instead got misdirected to the small stage cabaret which was hilarious for David and I in our inebriated states but being swarmed by lady-boy after the show was initially hilarious it was just to much and hastened our departure. Despite our hasty departure the cabaret crew found David and I at a near by bar and joined us for some drinks which was great fun getting to ask our ignorant and most likely to direct questions. On a later date I found the big stage Cabaret called Simon’s Cabaret in Patong with the Chinese crew, but that is for later.

To conclude this three step plan of awesomeness resulted in one unforgettable day even considering the good and the bad. Picture time!

I am super excited that at the end of the month I will be going to Thailand for almost 2 weeks. So far I am thinking a few days in Bangkok then Phuket. I think I should hit 1 more place but not sure where yet. Maybe Ko Samui? I know that would make my friend Sarah happy.