This is absolutely hilarious! Conan O’Brien chats up some South Korean tourists at a wax museum and convinces them that he did something that would be truly epic (I don’t want to ruin it…you can watch the video). I love how he even got plenty of oooh’s, awes, and double waves from them.
This is one of those things that always makes me laugh, but I know someone’s going to yell at me about it. It’s not about anyone and just funny, and before you ask YeYe happens to reside far above the curve. Also this was blatantly stolen from this blog Yellow Magic but the blog hasn’t been updated in nearly 2 years. I’m posting it here in the interest of preserving this little gem so that it doesn’t disappear if the original blog gets removed from the intarwebs (but please at least click on the link to give them traffic). Oh and I think Sam originally shared this with me…thank you Samuel.
But first a clip from How I Met Your Mother showing the origins of this graph:
Youtube link to How I Met Your Mother
Plagiarized from Yellow Magic:
One day when I was watching an episode of CBS’ hit TV sitcom How I Met Your Mother, one of the main characters in the show makes a provocative mathematical representation of a woman’s “datability.” In this, admittedly overly simplified definition, a woman’s datability is determined by her ratio o f hot to crazy. Please watch the video for the full theory as defined by Barney.
So what Barney has done is define a classical economics indifference curve, with datable women above the graph and undatable women below. Now while his ideas are interesting, it’s ultimately too simple. To start off, every man has differing Crazy/Hot Graphs (CHGs), representative of their preferences. In Barney’s case, he prefers his women to be hotter than they are crazy. However, there is no reason why the preference ratio has to be 1:1 or better, nor does that ratio need to be consistent throughout the graph. The linear graphical depiction as presented in HIMYM is a rather unique case. To make a more generalized graph that fits the majority of guys, I would like to present my own Crazy/Hot Postulate). While the details are up for debate, the general idea is there and 60% of the time this will apply every time
To start off, we should define the parameters of our graph. Starting with the X axis, we start off with 0 crazy, indicating a completely rational logical human being. Basically a man with boobs and better hygeine. This axis then runs to 100% crazy, on the level of Elizabeth Bathory of Hungaria or perhaps the classy broads of 2Girls1Cup. On the Y axis we have a pretty stereotypical 0-100 Hot Scale. With 0 as Hillary Clinton and 100 being ludicrously hot (insert your ideal woman here, as long as it’s not Hillary Clinton).
Figure 1: Crazy Hot Graph
Now let’s move to the plot itself. In my estimation, the y-intercept can not be 0. No matter how not Crazy a girl is, there’s a certain Hot threshold that most guys simply will not dip below. Starting from there, we have a traditional exponential rise. In the beginning there is not a significant demand of Hotness for an increase in Craziness because the total Crazy is so low. But as the total Craziness builds, every additional increase in Craziness warrants a much higher increase in Hot. In lay terms, if your girlfriend is low in Craziness and high in Hotness (much like the significant other of yours truly), she sits well above the curve. Any minor increase in Craziness will not nudge her past the line into undatable territory. But if you happen to have a girl that’s sitting right on the curve, any prolonged or permanent increase in Craziness without the necessary increase in Hotness (or vice versa, as stipulated by her location on the graph) will make her as unappealing as a conversation on cramps and bloating.
Let’s continue. As you can see there is a point at which the graph no longer rises continuously, instead there is a discontinuous jump to a platform we designate the Jessica Alba Plateau. The jumping off point is personal to each guy depending on his risk tolerance. We arbitrarily drew the line at the level of Crazy where there is SIGNIFICANT risk of physical harm. When the risk is already that high, any further increases in Craziness is virtually unnoticeable. After all, if you’re gonna get stabbed in the leg with a butter knife, what’s another fork in the arm? Thus there is no further demand on Hotness with additional increases in Craziness. The extra demand is made at the initial jump point. This Hotness differential between the endpoint of the continuous graph and the start of the JAP is the luxury tax a girl must pay to be THAT crazy and still datable, something we call the Preposterously Bananas Levy (PBL).
Figure 2: Area under the curve = bad timesWell that basically sums up the major points on the graph. Now let’s look at one final thing, a simple integral. From here you notice that the integral defines the entire undatable zone. Since the area changes drastically with individual CHGs, this is reflective of each guy’s selectivity factor.
In Korea, there is a superstition that being in an enclosed room with a fan running (especially overnight) can result in a persons death.
Beware Deadly Weapons
This is one of the most picked on Korean Superstitions by expats living here. Although I don’t think I know many people that believe in this (perhaps I should start asking around work) it is accepted as fact widely. Enough to warrant news attention and government bureaus issuing statements about it, such as this one:
If bodies are exposed to electric fans or air conditioners for too long, it causes [the] bodies to lose water and [causes] hypothermia. If directly in contact with [air current from] a fan, this could lead to death from [an] increase of carbon dioxide saturation concentration [sic] and decrease of oxygen concentration. The risks are higher for the elderly and patients with respiratory problems. From 2003 [to] 2005, a total of 20 cases were reported through the CISS involving asphyxiations caused by leaving electric fans and air conditioners on while sleeping. To prevent asphyxiation, timers should be set, wind direction should be rotated and doors should be left open.
-Korean Consumer Protection Board
There are tons of ways this superstitions is attempted to be rationalized through some bastardization of science. Here is a brief list:
I don’t even know how this belief gets perpetuated in a country like Korea, since most people are so well educated (because of the awesome value Korean culture puts on education…please start doing this more America). Even though it seems like such a benign superstition it does have one annoying effect, that is people leaving their windows open while the air conditioning is on. This drives me nuts because it is just such a huge waste of resources and terrible for the environment. I know a guy whose language academy actually told him he is not allowed to turn the AC on without the windows open because of fan death beliefs. Anyways, I hope you enjoyed learning a little about Korean superstitions.
I know you might not be able to understand the video in Korean but I love the little animation in the corner of a guy dying by the apparent sonic waves emanating from the fan. Or the shots around the corner of a door attempting to make the fan look sinister, like a dangerous animal you shouldn’t get near.
Link to the above Youtube clip
Fan Death warnings
Sticker warning of Fan Death
Hobbit House
TIL that in the Philippines there is a place called the Hobbit House. The Hobbit house is a bar designed like, well the name says it all, a Hobbit’s House. The place is even completely staffed with “Little People”. My more politically correct self is somewhat against this…but come on! It’s a bar designed like a hobbit’s house with little people, I would so go there.
I don’t know what is really going on in these comics, they are all somewhat weird, but very entertaining and creative. Also I don’t know the comics name or who is translating them. So kill some time and have a look.
This is a hilarious site of Kim Jong-Il looking at things. Hilarious because if you think about most pictures you have ever seen of this diminutive dictator then they were probably of him looking at things.
Kim Jong Il looking at things
Also fun to read is The Onions piece on if Kim Jong Un is crazy enough to succeed his father.
Kim Jong-Un Privately Doubting He’s Crazy Enough To Run North Korea
A ritter closer
So today is 11/11 which in Korea is known as Pepero Day which everyone gives and gets Pepero sticks (more widely known as Pocky sticks, their Japanese name). Pepero sticks are, as defined on Wikipedia:
Pepero (빼빼로) is a cookie stick, dipped in chocolate syrup, manufactured by Lotte Confectionery in South Korea since 1983. It was inspired by the Japanese product, Pocky produced by Glico.
I think there should be a warning carried on the boxes stating that they are as addictive as Crack. Just told myself that I was only going to eat a few out of the box I just opened, but that did not happen. I am throwing the empty box away as I type…and horribly missing the garbage bin cuz this white boy can’t play B-Ball. This day definitely does not help us with ever expansive waist lines because armies of little monkeys (my nickname for Korean students) will give you enough Pepero Sticks to last you through your 30s…but don’t worry you will demolish them all in a matter of days resulting in a diabetic coma.
The Pepero Day idea was obviously started as a marketing ploy by companies such as Lotte, that market this super addicting little candy. They chose November 11th because when the date is written out in numerical form it looks like a bunch of sticks 11/11 (like the candy). I wonder if there will be an even bigger event for 11/11/11. Oh and my favorite is that you can buy these damn sticks in giant form! Up to almost a meter in length (about 3 feet for those back home).
Pepero Day Display
Also to go along with todays post I have some musical weirdness from Japan to report. Apparently there has been some new pop singers in Japan (nothing new there) but with a little twist. They aren’t real people they are Holograms! Oh and I don’t mean Holograms that just conceal the real person singing (like Gorillaz does with their cartoons), there aren’t any real people singing, it’s a computer program creating the voice. First, check it yourself (it’s better in HD, go to youtube to watch that):
Hatsune Miku – The World is Mine
Apparently, her voice is rendered using a program called Hatsune Miku which is based on a really interesting going by the name of Vocaloid. Vocaloid is a program that samples voices and allows someone to use a synthesizer to peace together words, lyrics, melodies, etc… sounds like a really cool program if you have some time to nerd out. Although, I’m not sure how I feel about cyberstar being born and strutting about the stage. But thank you Japan for always being creative and strange.
Next on the music list today, is a badass little Korean kid who will blow your mind on a guitar. His name is Sungha Jung, here is his website, and he is totally worthy checking out more of his stuff than just this clip.
Also it’s worth checking out this clip with Sungha Jung jamming with Andy McKee:
This Halloween is definitely one for the books full of fun and shenanigans. But before I just jump to the end I need to begin with a little back-story.
To begin this little story we must first talk about Ernie. Ernie, like me, is another guy from my little town of of suburban sprawl in Northern California. He also happens, like me, to be living in Korea, although about 4 hours to the west of me in a city called Gwangju (which might just happen to have the most useless subway line ever). Well Ernie’s day of birth is right before Halloween and for her gift to Ernie, Laurelle (Ernie’s wonderful girlfriend) decided to give Ernie the best gift ever. Her gift was to fly his best friend, Sam, out from California. She even organized all of this in secret without Ernie ever finding out (although I’m sure, knowing Ernie he will say “I knew the whole time” and actually convince himself that this is true…he will deny this too). This in my opinion has to be one of the best gifts I have ever heard of a girlfriend giving her man. I mean secretly organizing with Sam (who is busy as hell with law school), funding the flights, and even planning the ground logistics once Sam landed…you go Laurelle!
So fast forward a month or so into the weekend of Halloween. I’m all stoked to finally get to see Sam after almost 2 years, during which we talked very little (Sam is busy and I’m terrible about keeping in contact), and I’m talking to a mutual friend Eddie, who is another guy from the same suburb but now living in Hong Kong, about Sam’s first visit to Asia. Which some how arises to “Eddie come to Korea” which Eddie currently being unemployed meant he had the time but not necessarily the funds…although credit cards helped with that situation.
Moving a little farther forward it’s the Friday before Halloween and I just had taken the KTX up to Seoul. After 2 or 3 hours having fascinating conversations with mid-western American girl, named Angela, on the train I get a phone call from Laurelle’s friend picking me up at the KTX station. She tells me, that she will meet me at the station, she doesn’t have a mobile phone, and that she will find me. This automatically makes me leery because of similar situations I have had with people saying don’t worry I’ll find you, prompting me to wait around for long periods of time where the other person never finds me. So I ask, “well, ughh, what do you look like so I can look for you?” and I get a description of “oh I’m short with short blonde hair” a little vague but apt if you ever meet Sarah.
After the train finally arrives at Seoul station, I say my goodbyes to my train buddy, Angela. She parts with wishing me luck finding the short blonde girl. So immediately when I walk into Seoul station I find 3-4 other short blonde girls waiting in the arrivals area which none of them was Sarah and all in widely different areas of the station. Not knowing if one was Sarah, I would slowly but with slight intent walk towards one hoping to see if they would recognize me (I gave Sarah my description as a big guy, with a beard, and a curly moustache…not to many look alikes with that description), which as you could guess would just result in a confused, uncomfortable gaze at me…which I would immediately flee from. So repeat this fun process several times until I run out of potential Sarahs. At this point a little blonde girl making a B-line towards me while scooting her boots on the floor (later I asked her why and it was out of fear of slipping) and says “Are you Ryan?” Which I naturally said “yes” too. She informed me that a another foreigner asked her if she was looking for a tall bearded guy with a mustache and pointed Sarah in the right direction (thanks Angela). Now it was off to meet up with Sam, Ernie, Laurelle, and their troupe at the bus station.
Sarah and I arrive at the bus station and blindly wander around until we finally find them and do the usually hugs, hellos, and other awkward PDAs. Eddie sadly did not join us that night because his last minute flight was delayed something like 9 hours…ridiculous, but then again everything with Eddie and meeting up usually goes that way (I haven’t wrote about trying to meet up with Eddie in Shanghai yet…oh man). Now skipping into list mode to save you the time of having to read more fluff (like this fluff describing reading fluff) about some things we did in Seoul:
After sleeping for roughly 2 hours and 45 minutes, I was awakened by everyone to send Sam off to the airport. So mastering myself despite being somewhere between drunk and hungover, we took Sam down to the bus station. From there we said our goodbyes and Sam and I briefly spoke about meeting in Nepal next year. After Sam parted I partook in some On The Border Mexican food (the gods were smiling on me by placing that restaurant in near proximity to me while in such dire hungover straits) which increased my functional capacities considerably. Then it was off to the KTX and back to Busan where the hangover lasted a whole day more.
Man I love Halloween!
Sometimes during my travels through Korea I will see things that just … well just dumbfound me. Either things that I have to assume are mistranslations but can’t fathom what word was attempted to translate or and advertisement that frankly just doesn’t make sense…here are examples of both.
I was enlightened to a new phenomenon in Korea that did not exist in my lexicon of experiences. Normally on a Saturday night I end up going out to some hot spot in Pusan such as Kyungseung (경성), PNU (부산대학교), Haeundae (해운대), or Semyeon (서면) and hitting the local bars, clubs, or Makgeolli place (막걸리). Last Saturday night I happened to be having a guys night with my buddies Marc and Tim in the Kyungsung area. We began to hit all of the normal favorite bars such as Kino-Eye, Thursday Party, etc… but I have now discovered my favorite bar in Korea. At the risk of sounding like Jay and Silent Bob from Clerks, my new favorite bar is just having beers in front of a mart on a busy corner. I know it sounds lame but keep with me while I explain.
In a normal bar situation you pull up to the bar and buy a pricey drink (same price of 2 drinks at a bar will let you drink all night at the Apex) then you either speak over very loud music or attempt to go dance. During this time you see scores of the same people rolling in their crew. Generally as the night moves on you will be seeing the same people and same antics if you stay at that one bar. At the Apex basically the night life of Korea is brought to you as it parades on by which can be hilarious and extremely fun in it’s own right.
Things that happened on Saturday night:
