Rather be ashes than dust » Humor

I’ll Be Afraid of You!

ryguy — Tue, 17 Jan 2012 10:32:00 +0000

So I get easily bored at work. To alleviate this I pull pranks on the kids. I know childish, but it keeps me sane. One thing I do is scare the kids. Like just walking up behind them and then saying “BOO!” The other day I scared some student that I’ve never before spoken too. I finally ended up subbing in her class and then she drew this picture of me and we had a re-enactment.

I'll be afraid of you!

Thank you for the food Jesus

ryguy — Sun, 15 Jan 2012 13:03:50 +0000

Thanks Jesus. De Nada

How Witches came to fly on brooms.

ryguy — Mon, 21 Nov 2011 10:44:07 +0000

I was trolling my usual internet haunts and stumbled across this little piece of information. Those of you that know me know how much I love random trivia, this is definitely being added to my random fact list. Now read on about how the legends of witches flying on brooms came about.

A text talking about the origin of witches flying on brooms

Yeah that’s right…witches flying on brooms were really crazy broads flying high on drugs that they stuck up their va-jay-jays. WTF?

Here is more info about that.

Fixing Bengay’s Drain

ryguy — Sat, 24 Sep 2011 15:32:12 +0000

Perhaps one of the best things said about me recently…

Ryan is a genius, a man among men, a philosopher, and thanks to him there is no longer a toilet brush stuck in Ben’s shower drain. Welcome back to Busan dude! ♥

As too why Ben thought shoving a toilet brush into his drain was a good idea, I am not sure. But luckily I arrived boozed up enough from going to the Lotte Giants baseball game to achieve retard strength. Thanks Megan for the lovely quote.

Naked guy fighting in the streets of Busan

ryguy — Sat, 24 Sep 2011 14:30:48 +0000

So a friend of a friend was walking around Youngdo (the island near Busan Station with Taejongdae on it) and witnessed a Korean couple fighting in the streets. She pull out her phone and starts recording shortly after a naked dude saunters up and joins the fray. Watch for the part where he totally gets laid out…I’m pretty sure bare ass on asphalt would leave a nasty mark. Enjoy!

Koreans fight naked in Busan

My Birthday is coming…

ryguy — Fri, 09 Sep 2011 16:43:53 +0000

…does that mean I get a visit from the Birthday Skeleton?

Funny Condom Commercial

ryguy — Mon, 05 Sep 2011 18:34:24 +0000

Funny Condom Commercial

Dangers of Taxidermy

ryguy — Fri, 12 Aug 2011 06:22:46 +0000

I love some silly comedy posts on different blogs. This one made me loose my shit, I was crying laughing. Perhaps it was the Makoli I drank, perhaps it was the time (4am), or perhaps my level of maturity is not high enough (probably that), but this stuff is funny!

So jump over the Woot Blog for their post about the Dangers of Discount Taxidermy

"Jake, we're out of bear teeth-" "JUST SLAP SOMETHING IN THERE! What's the difference?!"

Also go to the post where Woot stole their stuff from at Terrible Taxidermy

Penis Corn Dog Anyone?

ryguy — Sun, 07 Aug 2011 10:52:12 +0000

I wonder if it tastes salty?

Yeye found this little gem on the internets when researching Taiwan. I think I most definitely will have to stop in for a penis shaped corn dog if I’m in the neighborhood. Here is a direct link to the article and a video of the guy making a penis corn dog.

Original Penis Corn Dog Article Link

Indian Drug Pushers

ryguy — Tue, 26 Apr 2011 15:46:17 +0000

This has been making me laugh in India for the past month, Indian drug dealers. I know a strange thing to find funny and for many reasons it’s not funny (kids don’t do drugs, unless you’re in a safe raving environment…jk they are bad). Here’s the deal, you’ll be walking down the street then slyly over your shoulder someone will whisper some pitch. But the way they talk is like some cheesy D.A.R.E. commercial from the early 90′s, with a breathy, comically sinister voice that draws out the final syllables with an exhale. Like (read in breathy voice) “Hey man, you want some Hashishhhhhhhhh? Some doppppppppe?” You answer by just not acknowledging their existence. This is so common that I’ll probably hear it twice on my 200 meter walk back to my hotel. But my favorite so far was in Darjeeling. I was walking through the big square where there are horses for the little kids to ride. When one of the horse handlers approached me and said “Hi would you like to ride a horse?” I giggled and said “No.” To which he followed in a sudden breathy voice “How about some Hashishhhhhhh?” I was so shocked I just started laughing at the dude, probably not the right response to a drug dealer, but he just walked away.

Btw really drugs are bad especially in India. I DARE to be cool here…but even if you’re down, don’t mix with the India drug crowd, it’s bad news.